The Hormone Hostage

There are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his very life into his own hands. This is a handy guide that shouls be as common as a driver's licence in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other.

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be over-reacting?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Should you be having that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRA SAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

- Source: The New Paper, Friday 22 Jul 2005, Pg 20 "Net BUZZ"